Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Double Standards

My two-year-old toddler's hypocrisy knows no bounds. It's really quite hysterical.

Take, for example, chewing with one's mouth open. At one, Laney didn't know better and would sometimes start trying to talk with food in her mouth. My son, whose gag reflex is mighty powerful, would begin to carry on and making a big fuss, gagging and whining. "She's showing me her food," he'd complain. "Stop her!" One-year-old Laney didn't understand at first.

Later, she got it, and she realized 'it' came with a lot of attention. So sometimes in the middle of dinner, she'd make sure Nicky was looking and open her mouth wide so he could witness the horror within. Of course, it elicited the very response she wanted. Nicky would gag and complain, "She's showing me her food!" A few seconds of chaos would ensue as we admonished her to chew with her mouth closed and told Nicky to stop complaining and look the other way. If Nicky would ignore her, she would stop. However, that little psychological trick is still lost on him.

So anyway, it was not so long ago, we were eating breakfast, and Nicky began to say something. Laney starts crying and whining, "He's showing me his food! Mommy, he's showing me his food!" She started swiveling in her chair to look away, making a huge show of how grossed out she was. "Make him stop!"

The thing is, normally, Nicky is pretty particular about this kind of thing. He never talks with a mouth full of food. She must have seen a bread crumb on his lip and began carrying on. Of course, Nicky realizing it's payback time, took a big bite and tried to get her to look, thus creating more chaos.

My guess is that she decided Nicky can't be the only one who gets attention for being grossed out. She wanted in on that action.

Toddler hypocrisy, take two.
My daughter is an exhibitionist. She likes to run around naked. She likes to run around naked while shouting, "Look at me! Look at me! Look at my butt!" Sometimes she'll assume the pose being demonstrated by my nephew here. . .
. . .and encourage others to look her naked direction. My subtle and modest daughter. Please, please tell me she'll outgrow that behavior!

One day Nicky came in from the bathroom to finish getting ready for the day. He needed to grab a clean pair of Tigger undies. He happened to be undressed from the waist down.

"Æsj! (Yuck!)," Laney said, sticking out her tongue and making a disgusted face. "You have to put on your underwear! Yuck! Blech!"

Oh, the horror! Poor,poor imposed-upon Laney.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

It never ends! At four Connor is still the king of double standards. My favorite is his constant admonishment that "Sharing is Caring" whenever he wants something that a sister has. But try to say it to him and forget it! "But Kaitie's not sharing with me!" he screaches in that whining, crying voice reserved only for dear old mom. Yes, I believe love is wanting to stab yourself in the eye with a pencil!

Miki said...

Ha! I had thought about using "love is wanting to stab a fork in your ear." Nice to see all of these loving, gentle phrases in regard to love. :)

The sharing double standard. Ah, yes. Sharing is only fun when someone else has to do it.