I heard this story second-hand as I was at my Norwegian class when it happened.
Seven was getting the kids ready for bed. Part of the nighttime routine is a going to the toilet. This night, Nicky decided he wanted to stand and pee. Most boys are doing this at this age already, but Nicky just hasn't been interested. He said he would do it when he was older. I'm all about precision aim, a skill most 3-and 4-year-olds don't have mastered as well as they might, so I've never pushed the issue. This night, he was ready. On this night, he stood, took aim, and all was a great success.
The story should end there. Of course, it doesn't.
Laney happened to witness the great event and decided that she, too, wanted to stand and pee.
"Laney, you can't stand and pee. You don't have a tisselur (kids' word for penis)," Seven tried to explain to her.
"I do too have a tisselur," Laney insisted. "I do!"
"No, you don't," Seven said in a very tired voice. This is not a battle one should have to fight at the end of the day.
"I do too! I can stand and pee pee."
Laney is not a child easily deterred. To demonstrate the point, she grabbed her little stool and set it in front of the toilet. She climbed up, then she lifted one leg in a sumo wrestler stance and tried maneuver her "tisselur" over the toilet -- one foot planted unsteadily on the stool, the other foot lifted high into the air. This resulted, of course, in failure. Understanding this, she was petulant.
"I'm NEVER going to use the toilet again!"
Ha! Take that, powers that be!
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2 comments:
I have some kid “bathroom & genitalia” stories myself. (Strange, considering I don't have kids)
1. My friend's daughter decided she too was going to stand and pee like her brother. She squeezed her bellybutton and tried to aim as pee dribbled down her leg.
2. I was working in an international preschool and caught 3 little boys checking each other out. One was full American, One half American/ half Japanese but raised Japanese, and one Japanese. There were about 4. The Japanese boy says to the 1/2 Japanese boy. "You’re American but you have a Japanese one". Apparently kids notice circumcision.
3. Friend's son declares that when he grows up his penis is going to fall off. Turns out he thought that adults did not have penises since he'd only seen female adults naked. When he was told it would NOT fall off he had a major meltdown tantrum.
OMG! Those are hilarious! Poor kid in number 3! He was like, "What? I'm going to be stuck with this little dangly thing FOREVER?! NOOOOOO!" Of course, later, it'll become the center of his universe, and he'll be thankful he wasn't saddled with a uterus instead.
Being pregnant was one of life's most amazing experiences to be sure, but I, for one, did not "glow" while I was growing little people in this body. In my next life, I want to try out the dangly half of the species.
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